Whew, another long day and I'm wiped out. Sooo... that means another short post. Sorry! :( Here is a quick eye look I wore to school last week. Someone ALWAYS has to comment whenever I wear bright or bold eyeshadow. Colors like this normal to me, but there is always someone who says (usually a catty girl wearing thin veil of courtesy), "Wow, your eyeshadow is really... bright." No shit lady, I may not be the best at it, but I really did not apply it in the dark. I do know what color I'm wearing.
The time I wore this, a girl in my chemistry lab walked by and did a double take. "Um, why are you wearing orange eyeshadow?!" I just stared at her in shock for a few seconds, not knowing what to say. My lab partner (a guy; he's really cool) said, "Uh, maybe because she wants to?" I just smiled at her at her and said, "Well duh, you couldn't think of that yourself? You had to ask me?" At this point my lab partner was sniggering at her and I guess she didn't expect him to take up for me so she spun around really quick and went back to her table. I just told me lab partner, "What a dumb bitch", we laughed for a minute and moved on. She still glares at me whenever she sees me. I just smile at her.
I don't understand why people feel the need to boost themselves by tearing other people down. Or trying at least. I'm far enough out of middle school to where the mean things girls say doesn't bother me. I obviously wear or do something because I like it, not because you do. How hard is that to comprehend?! When people are catty like that, I just laugh at them. They are plainly insecure and trying to boost their self image by ruining yours, so laughing at them is probably the worst thing you can do.
On that note, here I am in my orange eyeshadow.
I'm wearing some mattes from Sleek's Paraguaya palette on my eyes, and Tarte's Amazonian Clay blush in Glisten on my cheeks. I'm not wearing anything on my lips because I forgot. Boo. I ended up wearing MAC Evolution Revolution lipglass and wish I had gotten a picture of the whole look together.
I've decided to post pictures of myself more often. I'm tired of being insecure because I'm overweight. I'm not so afraid of being judged because I'm fat, but because I'm weak. Being overweight shows that I'm weak and THAT is what bothers me for other people to know. I'm ashamed that I'm not happy with my current body (mostly for health reasons), but I lack the willpower to change it. I know plenty of people who are overweight and perfectly content with themselves. But that isn't me, and I try my best to hide my discomfort with myself because my weakness scares me. I also think I just try to ignore it, which keeps me being fat, because I would be reminded of my failings. So, I try not to think about it (even though it doesn't really work, haha). Does that make sense?
Woah, this post was longer and more personal and introspective than I originally planned. Eh, it was cathartic to type about, even if no one reads it!
But to those who did, thank you for reading and have a great day/night/whatever!